Ok, recently i was parading about in my room in ma thong..with my small ikebe.....feeling all sexy and all...then my mum walks in on me...see's me wearing a thong....and throws a fit..calls my dad and reports 2 him...that am changing into some wayward lil slut.and my dad accuses me of practicin 'harlotry' in his house...bwahahahaha..Lord help me!!!...so am goin for deliverance with my mum when i get back to lagos before my next session in school starts...
okay so i just tot twas a tad bit funny to b makin a fuss over a thong...so i cooked up a funny trial in my head and thought i'd share it with you all..some of the law terms used might not be correct..cuz m not that conversant with them..its just what ive picked up from my couch potatoe days of watching court drama's on t.v....so bear with me..here it goes..
**********************************************************Theresa Dimkpa ur under arrest for having in possesion some items which seem displeasing to the plaintiff..and for practicn 'harlotry in a house of God...anything u say or do wud be used against u in the court of 'daddy'...
the trial begins.....
All rise!

honorable judge Dimkpa presiding....be seated please.
mrs lawson for the plaintiff
mr deeds for the defence

judge :how does the defendant plead

Theresa :not guilty ur honour.
u may proceed.

mrs lawson :ur honour i'd like to call Theresa to the stand.
(do u miss Theresa. swear to tell the truth...the whole truth and nothing but the truth so help u God)

Theresa: i do

mrs lawson :ms theresa isnt it true that on the 29th of august u were caught by the plaintiff...ur mother...prancing about in an item that u were well aware that she dissaproved of.

Theresa :yes i was..but(cut short by mrs lawson)

mrs lawson:thats all i need to know..and can u please tell the court what this item was

Theresa : a thong

(a loud awww is heard in the court)....

mrs lawson: prior to that fateful day u were caught..were u known to wear thongs

Theresa: i wasnt known to wear them..but i did

mrs lawson :isnt it because uve totally become a way-ward girl...and all uv been doin is purposely to annoy ur mother.

Theresa: no it isnt and i think my mother should get over herself(and i mean no disrespect)
..everything i do is not to scorn her.
(MR DEEDS CROSS EXAMINES LAIDE)

mr deeds :ms theresa isnt it true that u were made to wear thongs because u despised 'VPL'
VPL...meaning visible panty line.

mrs laide :thats very true

mr deeds :because of the way dose full panties cut ur ass in half and made it seem like u had 4 different asses...thereby makin u the butt of all jokes(NO PUN INTENDED)

Theresa: none taken...yes thats true i cudnt take the ridicule anymore..ao i opted for 'VPL' FREE SOLUTION-THONGS.

mrs deeds :u indeed had no intentions of practicing harlotry..as u wer accused of...and weren't aware that ur wearing of thongs wud anger the plaintiff being..mrs dimkpa.

Theresa :yes that is very true..

Mr deeds: did mrs dimkpa ever tell u not to wear thongs,did she ever express her disdain for thongs infront of u?

Theresa :no she never did.

Mr deeds :and i presume u dont have any psychic powers to know what shes thinkin

mrs lawson: objection!

mr deeds :court is adjourned till tomorrow.

******The next day....

mrs lawson :isnt it true that on several occasions u made statements about purchasing g-strings and u were rebuked by mrs dimkpa

theresa: i dont recall

mrs lawson :u dont recall..u dont recall watching a movie with mrs dimkpa and seeing a woman wearing a thong and voicing ur interest in it..and she strongly warned u against.

Theresa :i dnt believe there ever was such a day like dat.

mrs lawson :ms theresa i hope u knw ur under oath.

Theresa :i am very much aware.

mrs lawson :then can u pls tell the court y u refused to let ur mum know ud started wearing thongs if u werent scared of the repercussion.

Theresa: haha...sorry...am 17 years old for crissakes.not friggin 5..goin on 6.i shud be able to buy wat i want witout running to mommy dear.

mrs lawson: isnt it because u knew hw much she hated it

theresa:no i dint

mrs lawson:but u still went on to purchase it..didnt u...because of ur love for 'harlotry'..and because u find pleasure in making ur mother angry...

Theresa: crying)..no no no....i admit it..i had a feeling in my mind that she might have some reservatns about it....but it was for a good cause...ive been suffering with VPL...for a while now and it was too much to bear...
the court wil go on 30mins recess will the jury deliberate on the verdict.

****30mins later....

judge:has the jury reach a verdict?

jury: yes ur honour..we the jury find the defendant guilty on all counts.
for possession of items that are displeasing to mrs dimkpa
and for practicing 'harlotry' in a house of God.

And is sentenced to one week in spiritual rehab(deliverance)and a lifetime of spiritual blackmail by her parents...

hahahha...i know m crazy.i knw i have a wild imagination..its wat kps me alive.